Dee, thanks for connecting and sharing your video. I did watch your video. You raise great points about transparency and authenticity. Well done.

Peter, I am moved by your story and I am deeply saddened by your loss. However, there is a difference between authenticity and transparency. I agree that it would not have served you well to be totally transparent during your roller coaster of grief. But authenticity does not imply that you cannot hold some things as private. That is why the process of remaining authentic is so difficult–there are no absolutes and no templates. It is all very personal. Here is a link to a video in which I explain some of the complexities of transparency.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oG6Dd7uYZgk&feature=em-upload_owner#action=share

I hope your heart is healing.
Dee

Hi Carl,

Thanks for taking the time to comment and share your experience and perspective.

All the best,
Peter

Hi Art,

Thanks for connecting and sharing your thoughts on the topic.

Peter

This is an inspirational article – thanks for that as I really appreciate having access to it at this stage in my life and career. I’ve always been authentic to my team. However I started to ask myself how authentic I needed to be to my staff now that I’m facing huge challenges with mental and physical health issues of immediate family members and the prospect of a relationship breakdown.

I’ve always put my team goals and welfare as a top priority and made a conscious decision not to share frustrations and negativity that could affect them. I was feeling less authentic but I see that being less authentic on sharing personal issues will work well if we keep being authentic and personal on our interactions as a team.

Wishing you the best,
Carl

Granted, it is exhausting and can go to a dark side if deepest feelings are shared all day, every day, so sometimes expressions of authenticity need to be rationed. But, the leader gains immense credibility in revealing some human qualities of uncertainty, doubt, or diminished enthusiasm.

Compartmentalizing personal and professional can allow authentic emotional expression, yet clear the decks for the business at hand.

Failing to express authentic emotion can erode the trust and belief of colleagues in how authentic the leader really is. Keeping balance is vital, but buttoning up throws away great power that devolves from human expression.

Hi Brian,

Thanks for your thoughtful comment and kind words. Authentic leadership is certainly a complicated, multi-faceted aspect of leadership. Thanks for sharing your insight.

Regards,
Peter

In both cases stepping forward and living up to what was best for the company.

Your four questions (and the questions from the manager you referenced) demonstrated you both living and managing in an authentic way (from your heart and with integrity and commitment and with others best interests at heart). I would argue that you WERE indeed being authentic. You lived your values – and to me that is a critical part of authenticity. In my opinion, authenticity doesn’t have to be 100% pure. Just living with honesty and doing what you believe is right. Just my 2-cents.

Your post is a wonderful, well-thought-out piece with depth.
Thank you for that. (And as a dad of 4 my heart goes out to you – with sadness for your daughter and respect for your willingness to be open about your story.)