Negotiation Tactic #52 – Feel, Felt, Found

Summary: Using empathy to show understanding for a counterpart’s concerns and to explain one’s own point of view.

Feel, Felt, Found is effective for helping your counterpart understand your point of view.


The buyer states, “I can’t believe you’re asking $30,000 for this software package.” The seller responds, “I can understand how you feel about the price. Many other owners have felt the same way until they found out how customizable and trouble-free our software is. There really is a difference, and that is what makes this price such a great value.”


The buyer could respond with the tactic of That’s Not Good Enough, insisting that $30,000 is simply too much, then pausing and waiting for the seller’s response. Or, the buyer could appeal to a Higher Authority, explaining that his wife or business partner will let him spend only $28,000. Finally, he could use the tactic of the Trade-Off Concession and agree to pay the $30,000 if the seller will throw in service and support for one year.

Have you used or encountered this tactic in your negotiations? If so, how’d it go?

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